Movie Review: Stripperland (2011)

September 20, 2012

The onslaught of bad movies continues! Although I admit, I brought this one on myself; my line of thinking was: Strippers, zombies, blood, awesome! Zombieland is one of only five movies* which I’ve outright purchased (i.e. not rented) from iTunes. Despite the sexism, I find Doghouse hilarious — and yes, I did get a kick out of Zombie Strippers. So I’d be foolish to assume that Stripperland wouldn’t be a whole lot of B-movie fun, right?

Right?

Guys?

There’s no reason to not be blunt here. Stripperland has no reason to exist. Written by Brad McCray, Tyler Benjamin, Shawn Justice, and Sean Skelding (whom also directed), Stripperland follows four survivors of the zombie apocalypse and their journey to the Oregon coast. The interesting thing about this zombie apocalypse is that the virus which caused it only affects women — and instead of turning into standard-issue zombies, the infected women become flesh eating strippers!

The uninteresting thing about Stripperland, however, is that you’ve already seen this movie scene-by-scene if you’ve watched Zombieland and Doghouse. This just might be the most unoriginal movie since The Hangover Part II or even the remake of The Omen. Between you and I, that isn’t an easy feat.

Honestly, Stripperland is wholesale theft. The aforementioned cast of four survivors is made up of Idaho (Ben Sheppard), Frisco (Jamison Challeen), Virginia (Maren McGuire), and West (Ileana Herrin), and they match the Zombieland characters down to the cowboy’s pastry love and the geek having a rule book. The theft from Doghouse is the whole idea of only women being infected by the virus, and even some character lines. I almost feel that the studio behind Stripperland should face a copyright lawsuit.

Okay, this is fucked up! You group all strippers together, and then you group all women together. You’re treating both groups like objects. And since strippers are women too, you’re double-objecting them!

Virginia

Are there arguably entertaining moments? Sure. That quote above is probably one of the better ones. Daniel Baldwin and Linnea Quigley are given cameos — which are great — but their five minutes can’t save this movie by any measure, and their appearance screams of them being low on cash. Otherwise Stripperland is an unfunny, unoriginal, and shockingly misogynistic movie.

I honestly feel horrible for the women who participated in this movie. The basic idea is that women are only good for sex and that the world would be better if they were all strippers. It’s so absurd that I want to believe this movie is satirical, but I didn’t get that sense at all. If satire was indeed the filmmakers’ intents, they are horrible filmmakers. They are indeed horrible filmmakers, however I’d wager that they also aren’t very bright people and that they believe in their message. I hope I’m wrong though, because people like that are toxic to progress and the less there are, the better.

So, is Stripperland worth your time? Do you even have to ask? NO! Zombieland and Doghouse (although also somewhat sexist, which also happens to be on Netflix USA as of this writing [hint hint]) are much funnier, much gorier, much more original, and much more worth your time.

While Stripperland is available on Netflix USA as of this writing, your watching it is highly not advisable. Take my word for it. Heck, even Zombie Strippers, as genuinely bad as it is, is a whole lot of fun, so of you want to see zombies pole dance, you should pick that one up.

*The other four iTunes movie purchases (again, different from rentals) are 10 Things I Hate About You, Jennifer’s Body, Heartless, and Pieces of April.

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